276A — You're so normal that you just disappear...
This post is pinned because of discussion of the Highlands Ranch shooting which occurred early in the week of May 6th, located at the top of this post. "Normal" blog content is located below it. Its comparatively jarring tone is not meant, in any way, to be disrespectful—it was written first, and then moved below.
I had some thoughts I wanted to share about the shooting at the STEM School in Highlands Ranch, Colorado, which happened earlier this week, but seeing as it is nearing midnight, they will certainly not be as nuanced as I might otherwise hope them to be. The disgusting thing about American gun violence (and war and violence in general) is that the impacts often feel impersonal—other's people's lives in other places—and although the fear does sometimes strike that "that could be me" and the events do spur action to make a change, it doesn't feel as real as it probably should. The thing that struck me most about this shooting, then, was that it felt personal to me. The STEM school has an FRC team (4418, Impulse, who had excellent matching shirts) which participated at the Colorado Regional. The individuals who were injured, the individual who sacrificed himself saving the lives of others—I could've easily walked past all of them there without even knowing it, and now they are hurt and he is gone, and a community is left grieving and scarred—both in Highlands Ranch, and throughout the world, in FIRST, and in humanity. It feels wrong to say that this feels more personal than other attacks have been because it acknowledges a sort of learned helplessness, an instilled callousness about the harms being perpetrated to the world, and yet alas, here we are. There is naught I can do but send my condolences, my thoughts, and my prayers, and live to serve out a philosophy that might someday change these kinds of situations, through engagement with others, graciousness in action, and advocacy for change. The youth, the equivalency to self involved shows me a sort of strange fleetingness to life, which has never truly struck me as strongly before. This kind of scarcity breeds value, and emphasizes the importance to go out and meet new people, learn their stories before they are gone, be there for them when they are hurt, and allow their memory and values to live on beyond them. Perhaps this is something STEM activities fail to emphasize, but if there's anywhere where change can start, it is FIRST.
I'll insert here a (slightly edited for context) quote from a blog from a mentor of one of the best teams in the world to close this passage.
Today was a reasonably good day. I did not end up sleeping any earlier than usual last night due to what can only be described as reasons, but I got to sleep in a little bit this morning anyways, so I got a significant amount of sleep, relative to the amounts I've been getting throughout the rest of this week.
I got up this morning, had breakfast, sharpened my nine pencils and acquired my three pens of choice, and then kind of just chilled out before driving to the test center with plenty of time to spare. At the test center, I continued to relax, talking to friends beforehand and waiting for the AP Chemistry exam to finish. Eventually, that did happen, and our exam started not long after. In theory, I am not allowed to discuss the content of today's exam, so I suppose I won't. Suffice it to say that the multiple choice was harder than I thought it was going to be, and the FRQ was much easier.
After the exam, a group of us went and got food at Culver's and browsed various AP memes. Eventually, the novelty of that wore out, so I went and got a long overdue haircut and then headed home, where I was planning on working on AP Biology review. Unfortunately, that plan fell flat, as I fell asleep and got a two or three hour nap in right, lasting up to right before dinner, killing any hopes for making tomorrow an easy day for review. After dinner, I wrote a script for the last episode of our telenovela (which took surprisingly long but will be quite excellent), and then I managed to get in an hour or so of review, but that still leaves four more for tomorrow. Tomorrow should just be FRQ and random bits and pieces though, so it shouldn't be too hard to get that much work in. Just need to stay awake, and actually use the time I'm given. Oops.
Tomorrow, my third-to-last (or possibly second-to-last) Friday of the year. My last pre-concert in-class Orchestra rehearsal. A whole lot of AP Bio review. Oh boy.
I had some thoughts I wanted to share about the shooting at the STEM School in Highlands Ranch, Colorado, which happened earlier this week, but seeing as it is nearing midnight, they will certainly not be as nuanced as I might otherwise hope them to be. The disgusting thing about American gun violence (and war and violence in general) is that the impacts often feel impersonal—other's people's lives in other places—and although the fear does sometimes strike that "that could be me" and the events do spur action to make a change, it doesn't feel as real as it probably should. The thing that struck me most about this shooting, then, was that it felt personal to me. The STEM school has an FRC team (4418, Impulse, who had excellent matching shirts) which participated at the Colorado Regional. The individuals who were injured, the individual who sacrificed himself saving the lives of others—I could've easily walked past all of them there without even knowing it, and now they are hurt and he is gone, and a community is left grieving and scarred—both in Highlands Ranch, and throughout the world, in FIRST, and in humanity. It feels wrong to say that this feels more personal than other attacks have been because it acknowledges a sort of learned helplessness, an instilled callousness about the harms being perpetrated to the world, and yet alas, here we are. There is naught I can do but send my condolences, my thoughts, and my prayers, and live to serve out a philosophy that might someday change these kinds of situations, through engagement with others, graciousness in action, and advocacy for change. The youth, the equivalency to self involved shows me a sort of strange fleetingness to life, which has never truly struck me as strongly before. This kind of scarcity breeds value, and emphasizes the importance to go out and meet new people, learn their stories before they are gone, be there for them when they are hurt, and allow their memory and values to live on beyond them. Perhaps this is something STEM activities fail to emphasize, but if there's anywhere where change can start, it is FIRST.
I'll insert here a (slightly edited for context) quote from a blog from a mentor of one of the best teams in the world to close this passage.
To 4418: I’m not equipped to offer comfort in the face of something like this. You should know that you’re in the thoughts and prayers of...mentors and teachers and students throughout the robotics world. We’re all grappling with some version of the same questions: “What if this happened [here]? What can I do?”
Today was a reasonably good day. I did not end up sleeping any earlier than usual last night due to what can only be described as reasons, but I got to sleep in a little bit this morning anyways, so I got a significant amount of sleep, relative to the amounts I've been getting throughout the rest of this week.
I got up this morning, had breakfast, sharpened my nine pencils and acquired my three pens of choice, and then kind of just chilled out before driving to the test center with plenty of time to spare. At the test center, I continued to relax, talking to friends beforehand and waiting for the AP Chemistry exam to finish. Eventually, that did happen, and our exam started not long after. In theory, I am not allowed to discuss the content of today's exam, so I suppose I won't. Suffice it to say that the multiple choice was harder than I thought it was going to be, and the FRQ was much easier.
After the exam, a group of us went and got food at Culver's and browsed various AP memes. Eventually, the novelty of that wore out, so I went and got a long overdue haircut and then headed home, where I was planning on working on AP Biology review. Unfortunately, that plan fell flat, as I fell asleep and got a two or three hour nap in right, lasting up to right before dinner, killing any hopes for making tomorrow an easy day for review. After dinner, I wrote a script for the last episode of our telenovela (which took surprisingly long but will be quite excellent), and then I managed to get in an hour or so of review, but that still leaves four more for tomorrow. Tomorrow should just be FRQ and random bits and pieces though, so it shouldn't be too hard to get that much work in. Just need to stay awake, and actually use the time I'm given. Oops.
Tomorrow, my third-to-last (or possibly second-to-last) Friday of the year. My last pre-concert in-class Orchestra rehearsal. A whole lot of AP Bio review. Oh boy.
Comments
Post a Comment
Comments are appreciated, as long as you're not being a total jerk.